A Three-Week Domestic Disaster

My husband was left alone for 3 weeks and I wish he’d just cheated instead. Three weeks ago,

I left for a work trip. My husband didn’t want to come. “I’ll hang back,

game a little, order pizza,” he said. He’s 41. I thought,

“Fine, he’s an adult, he’ll be fine.” He was not fine. Day 2,

he decided he was going to become a “grill master” even though we don’t own a grill.

He stacked three baking sheets on top of each other, poured lighter fluid over them,

and set off the smoke alarm for 40 minutes. The oven still smells like gasoline.

Then, he got really into “minimalist living” after a TikTok binge and threw away half