A Very Existential Christmas
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Hey. Quick question. Do you sell Christmas lights that flicker because they
are festive or because they have given up on life? Okay.
Good start. Do you have stockings that are decorative but also feel like a
threat? Yeah. Those. Do you carry wrapping paper that
says thoughtful gift but whispers last-minute panic? Perfect. I feel seen.
What about ornaments that are technically festive but absolutely getting brought up next year?
Great. I love consequences. Do you sell candles that smell like Christmas and
unresolved issues? Amazing. That is the one. Do you have
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