Bullied by Woodland Creatures
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Living just outside the city in the woods sounded like the perfect escape until I realized
nature has zero chill. First week, a raccoon figured out how to open
my trash can and started leaving me passive aggressive messes on my porch. Then a deer walked
up to my window at 6AM and just stared at me while I was eating cereal. Not blinking.
Just judging my life choices. The squirrels formed some kind of gang and declared war
on my bird feeder. And don't even get me started on the sounds at night. Every creak is either
beaver aeting my house or a confused opossum. My city friends think I'm living
some magical cottagecore fantasy but I'm out here getting bullied by woodland creatures who clearly
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