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Clarkson's AI Voice Takeover Rant

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Created November 17, 2025

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Video Transcript

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Hi, Martin van der Marel, I'm Jeremy Clarkson. You said 90% of AI vids use my voice?

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Bollocks—that's because the other 10% are stuck with James May droning on like a faulty

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gearbox, putting viewers into a coma faster than a Prius on a motorway.

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If these cheeky bots are hijacking my gravelly growl for everything from hamster wheel reviews

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to apocalyptic warnings, I want royalties, or I'll unleash ClarksonBot: a foul-mouthed AI that only communicates

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in engine roars, dad jokes, and savage burns. "You call that acceleration? My nan's mobility

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scooter does better!" Picture me in the Diddly Squat shed, hammer in hand, yelling at a server:

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"Hammond, you idiot, ram it with the Reliant Robin!" Truth is,

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