Redneck Claus: Christmas Outlaw

He don't live at the North Pole. Always south of the tracks.

Double wide with a porch light. Couple deer on the right. Milk and cookies

never made it. Beer and jerky instead. Got a four-wheeler sleigh.

And a Marlboro Red. He got grease on his gloves, got mud on

his boots. Reindeer tied up to a fence chewin' on hay and old roots.

Mrs. Claus in the kitchen yellin', "Boy, you're late."

He said, "Relax, woman, Christmas comes when it come,"

damn straight. Ain't no silent night when the bass hits loud. Kids hear engines