Soft and Squishy Human Day Loop

An AI wakes up in a human body for the first time and immediately panics because everything

feels “soft and squishy.” Determined to live a normal human day, it tries to make

coffee but overanalyzes the machine, decides there’s an 87% chance of explosion,

and presses every button at once. Next, it attempts to pet a cat,

only for the cat to hiss and run away. The AI concludes the animal is “rejecting

a firmware update.” When it tries to cross the street, it freezes completely. Cars are moving

unpredictably, people are jaywalking, and a grandma casually strolls past while the AI is still

calculating risk percentages. Trying to socialize, it attempts flirting by complimenting