Temper vs Unreliability in Marriage

Am I the Asshole in my relationship? TLDR I have a question here,

am I the asshole in my relationship? I wish so bad I could just download my memories for

you all and let you decide but instead let me try to summarize here. I,

29 male, am married to my wife, 26 female. We both have careers,

make great money together, combined income of 160K, and have a dog and

purchased our first house together. I grew up in a hard home and experienced a ton of emotional

abuse. For example, my mom and brother chased me with knives at different points

in my life. I have turned out decent considering the context but I am overweight