The Wisdom of a Goldfish

Your pet goldfish might be the wisest philosopher you'll ever meet. So this guy's goldfish

starts talking one day, right? And instead of asking for better food

or a bigger tank, it goes "Hey human, I've been watching you for three years and I gotta ask,

why do you keep staring at that glowing rectangle all day?" The guy's like "It's

called a phone, I'm staying connected." The goldfish laughs and says "Connected? Dude,

you haven't made eye contact with another human in weeks. I'm literally swimming

in circles in a glass prison and I'm more free than you are." Plot twist?

The goldfish was actually his therapist's homework assignment about perspective, but he'd been so