Lactose Revenge: A Roommate's Lesson

My roommate kept stealing my leftovers so I finally had enough and made him pay.

I cooked this amazing pasta dish and loaded it with extra cream, cheese, and milk knowing

damn well he's severely lactose intolerant. I labeled it with my name like always and put it right

in the front of the fridge. That night I waited until I heard him heating something

up in the microwave. I immediately went to the bathroom and locked the door. I brought my phone

and just sat there scrolling. About thirty minutes later I heard footsteps running full speed

down the hallway. Then the most desperate pounding on the bathroom door I've ever heard.

He was literally begging me to hurry up. I told him I had food poisoning and